Sometimes you just have to listen to yourself. That little voice that gives you ideas isn’t always wrong. You have to have faith in your abilities or else no one else will. I feel like a motivational speaker when I write things like that, but there’s a reason they’re so cliche and why they’ve been said a million times. They’re true. You can start small and give yourself some confidence.
Say- “Today, I will cut up an onion, and it will not go all over the place. I will chop it perfectly and look like a chef while doing it.”
What things will you need? An onion, a good knife, youtube, and maybe some help from an experience onion cutter. And you’ll do it. And it will look swell. And then your confidence will climb, just a little bit. Not a mountain, but a good sized sledding hill. And you’ll own the onion. And maybe you’ll move on to carving carrots all fancy like they do at Thai restaurants. Who knows. Confidence will make or break you.
When I got to Kelly’s, it was bright and sunny with not a cloud in the sky. There was no shade. I made a quick mental note that she had light eyes. Awesome. She was going to squint and my pictures were going to be really flat and washed out. And then I thought, “What’s this whole ‘shooting into the sun’ business?” So I tried it. And the picture was horrible. So I fiddled with the settings, while Kelly fiddled with her horse’s bridle. And I acted like I planned this. And I shot the pictures. And they actually turned out. The onion was mine. And it was chopped. Maybe not perfectly. Maybe not the way a chef would do it. But there it was.
The pictures turned out far better than I could have imagined. Sure, they’re blown out in spots, and the colours aren’t realistic at all. But they have feel, and convey a message and an emotion, and they mean something to me. They mean that I’ve finally listened to myself and pushed a little farther than I thought was comfortable. And I didn’t die. I didn’t fail. And that little voice didn’t say a word. It was far too busy giving me a “told you so” smile.